If I one more time have to experience someone misusing the word “Literally” I think I am going to stab myself in the eyeballs.

I can’t count the amount of times I have heard or read something like this.

Here is an excerpt from one of those idiotic mass email forwards people feel compelled to send out.

“The class was asked to go out and smile at three people and document their reactions.

I am a very friendly person and always smile at everyone and say hello anyway. So, I thought this would be a piece of cake, literally.”

No you dimwit. If it was literally a piece of cake that would mean that you would be baking a damn cake for your assignment, not smiling at people. Dumb ass.

By the way, I purposely used incorrect English in the post title, literally.

Japan’s new Prime Minister, Yukio Hatoyama, won a landslide victory last week and is set to take office later this month. Hatoyama is himself eccentric by Japanese standards, choosing to wear green suits instead of the standard-issue dark blue ones worn by most men and for not combing his hair, but his wife is rather more distinctive.

In a book entitled “Very Strange Things I’ve Encountered”, the first lady relates: “While my body was asleep, I think my soul rode on a triangular-shaped UFO and went to Venus. It was a very beautiful place, and it was very green.”

The 66 year old cookery expert and musical actress also claims she met Tom Cruise in a previous life – when he was Japanese, naturally – and is looking forward to making a movie with him in the belief that she is destined to receive an Oscar for her performance.

on live TV, she once described how she ‘eats the sun’ every morning, closing her eyes and miming picking pieces of the star from the sky and placing them in her mouth: “Yum, yum, yum. I get energy from it. My husband also does this.”

She sure is making Michelle Obama look good.

Miyuki Hatoyama is Batshit Crazy

Link

In this day and age, why the heck do stupid moron idiot people TYPE IN ALL CAPS!

Are they completely retarded!?!!

HI I’M A MORON AND I THINK YOU NEED TO TYPE EVERYTHING ALL IN CAPS. SOMEONE PLEASE SAVE ME BY RIPPING THE CAPS LOCK KEY OUT OF MY KEYBOARD AND SHOVING IT UP MY ASS.

I also can’t stand the inverse of this, for example.

hi. i’m an idiot that thinks just because i am typing something for electronic communication rather than printed that i do not need to use proper capitalization and constantly type “I”, meaning “me” as a small “i”.

Can someone please help me line up all these people and punch them in the face?